Man, it’s hard to believe that it’s been nearly two months since we first turned a critical eye to Kansas City’s most laughable publication: ENVY. The self-proclaimed “lifestyle magazine” took the town by storm (?) with its October issue, which boldly instructed us to “Put Your Lighters Up KC!” Sic, of course, as with all things ENVY-related. That inaugural — and so far only, to our knowledge — issue brought us great advice like Well, the best piece of advice I can give anyone is said best in the famous words of Rev Run, “Your network determines your net worth.” Great! But since that issue, the city has been adrift. How are we supposed to know what the cool clubs are? Or which modeling search we should enter? Alas. We shall wait for you, ENVY. In the meantime, let’s enjoy this little gem from the rag’s media kit:
Our devotion to Kansas City culture is documented in an inimitable explosion of photos and candid information that leave our readers with a perspective and insight unmatched in Kansas City.
An “inimitable explosion”? Hard to believe we haven’t seen another issue.
